If I ask you to introduce yourself, you will say I am a founder, I am a designer, I am an engineer or I am a mother. What arrives in instant is what you do or what is your role? But is your role, your identity, what you do, is you? This role and identity are mental practice for thousands of times and hence associated with us as our breath is our integral part. But have we ever wondered in quiet moments, beneath these roles who we are? Is our identity our everything? Identity is for the outside world, role is for the outside world, what about the inside world?
Do your decisions and choices come from identity at the core or your essence at your core? Dive within, ask yourself why my success feels empty? What am I still missing in my life? And when you undo the habit of associating yourself with just your roles and identity of the outside world, the whole new periphery will open before you.
If your growth is associated with role notion, it will have limits. It will take you till your role can take you. But if your growth and fulfillment are aligned with your essence, your sphere of impact is much bigger and much deeper.
Give me a moment. Close your eyes for a second. Visualise you being a doctor. Where do you see yourself? Now visualise yourself as a life giver. Now where do you see yourself? A doctor is a role and a life giver is your essence. The one quality you are here to live for.
What essence actually is
We are a soul journey living in human form. Soul’s journey is that of growth and freedom and hence she attracts situations and unique expressions in this human form. Your essence is that one quality you are here to express as the most. This one unique quality of yours is not your job, your skills, your achievements or accolades. It is much quieter, subtle and more particular. It has the perfect ecosystem of alignment crafted for you, if you choose to live from that core.
For some this essence can be healing, for some mentoring or organising or nurturing. Each of us carries one. And when living that quality becomes the center of our life, life grows larger than who we are in our roles. Because our role will remain, till we will remain in that role, but that quality will remain for ever. The healer may become a therapist. The mentor may become a guide. The organiser may become a manager. These can become your medium to connect through your relationships and or through your work. The real expression, the real impact you will carry through is your that particular quality or essence. This expression of essence will make you authentic, real, and human. As who you truly are.
You know those moments of mid-life crisis or deeper quotations knocking the doors, what am I doing? Are meant to shake you and make you look deeper, within.
Why look within when the world is out there
Why do we look within when desperate with answers no world can suffice? Only your intuition or inner voice can enlighten. Because your outer world can only perceive with five senses and your mind, which has limited capacities. Whereas your inner world is expansive, eternal, infinite, only if we give it a chance.
I have been studying the life of our ancient sages, scriptures, pioneers, great rulers and creators and wondering how they could live so profoundly and what are we missing in the current scenario. Digging deep on the same question for thirty years, I have reached essence-led living. Much expansive, immensely fulfilling, the most a human can do comes from essence-led living whereas we have turned to identity-driven living. This is the art and science of being human. True human potential unleashing.
Once again, in silence, visualise yourself as a therapist and visualise yourself as a healer, what do you experience? What shows you more light, more vastness? More joy and fulfillment?
Why did we drift?
When we had this art and science of human becoming, what drifted us? Firstly, we began to believe in logic, sensory and tangible experiences. Acquisitions became our priority. Secondly, our definition of ‘self’ began to shrink. From the inter connected beings, we remained as I, me and myself. Our sense of accumulation exploded and our essence of human touch shrunk. Thirdly, in the name of modernisation, we began to lose touch with nature.
Why the drift costs us
The biggest cost we have to pay is we drifted away from our alignment and expansiveness. We filled ourselves with emptiness. Our potential and experiences got restricted. Our efforts and integrity since non-aligned didn’t pay off well. Most importantly, the churning remained that I could have done and given so much to life than my current life and unfortunately never getting the chance to know how? How to fill the void? How to strive for something larger than one’s self?
Have you noticed a few people who seem to move through life effortlessly? Full of life, filled with joy, touching all the lives that come their way, and contributing to the depth and breadth? Their presence feels like gifts to the world, they are living very close to their essence.
Where does fulfillment come from?
It comes from your valuable contribution to other lives and life itself. We, as humans, have a common trait of essence, which is creative-intelligence. We are here to sense
What shifts
You need not leave your current life aside. But once you have found your essence, you can begin to nurture yourself that way. And when matured enough your life will change its course very silently for you. This is my personal experience.
Your life seems more meaningful. Your worthiness has power now. From a consumer mode you shift to creative mode. Now life and situations do not dictate your choices and decisions, you have your own say. Your perception widens beyond current horizons. You do not settle on shallow waters. In the outside world people recognise your wisdom and depth. Most importantly, you begin to leave your mark and make this world a better place to live.
How to begin finding yours
Sit still for at least 15 minutes in a day, preferably when you wake up and before your daily chores begin to take your toll. Make it a discipline. Slow down. Pay attention to the choices you have made in some unusual moments of your life. Where was the source of those choices? Notice where your natural flow leads you to. What does it indicate? When have you felt like the most and uniquely you? And know this even when you unfold your essence in a moment, it will take you some time to establish enough. Maturing with your essence is a long journey.
Connect deeply. With your sorrows, your joys, your relationships, with situations, with work. Connect deeply. Deeper experience clears clusters within and opens your door to your essence. Live your experiences fuller. And yes, knowing your essence is not enough. It must grow and mature enough to become a lived reality.
Essence-led living is the slow, deliberate practice of meeting that quieter self, and then learning to live a whole life from it. It is the work I have shaped my own life around – and if something in these words has stirred in you, it may be the beginning of yours. As it has been in mine.